No, really. I'm not talking about being scared by the badness or mediocrity of some of the stuff. I'm talking about good songs - or at least decent ones - that are full of sincere ideas, right ideas, good ideas, sound theology...
Here's why it scares me.
I finished up my clinical journal assignment for the weekend at the breakfast table. Sanctus Real accompanied me through it, because they have the perfect sort of tempo/sound which pushes along without distracting. I ran upstairs to restart my computer so the printer would work after I type it up, and that was when I noticed that it was my laundry basket was full-to-the-brimming, it was eleven o'clock, and I meant to wash clothes today. So I trotted downstairs, basket and all, and set to sorting the stuff out in the laundry room. Sanctus Real played on, and I found myself mentally singing along... really just anticipating the lyrics and saying them in my mind almost before the singer voiced them.
And then, all of a sudden, the singing-along stopped being an automatic response, and I realized what I was singing:
Burn away the pride,
bring me to my weakness,
'til everything I hide behind is gone...
and when I'm open wide, with nothing left to cling to,
only you are there to lead me on.
'Cause honestly, I'm not that strong...
At that moment, I had a tingly, impending-sensation which pushed me back to last fall. At the Jars of Clay concert, Dan Haseltine warned the crowd before he sang 'Worlds Apart' to consider the song's plea as their own, and to take the implications of that seriously. "You'd better be ready to hear this song," he said, "Because I believe when we sing 'take my world apart' to God, he doesn't take that lightly."
It was in that moment that I realized how much Christian music scares me. The things I ask for when I aimlessly 'sing along' - even if it's something as stupid as a biddly-bop 'God is wonderful and I'm gonna be all about him' song that I don't even really like... by participating in those lyrics to some extent, I make them my own. I absorb them into my mind and heart before I spit them out again, mentally or outright singing, and they become a request... a cry from my heart... spread out before the face of God. And I believe Dan Haseltine is right; he doesn't take those requests lightly. When we ask God to break us down and make us completely his, he wants to do that. So when I ask God to burn away my pride, to expose my weakness, to make me nothing so everyone will know more completely that he is everything - that's something he will do, and delight to do!
But - oh, that terrifies me, because do you know what it means? Ow... that's what it means. Things like humility and brokenness don't come without pain and Yeah. I thought I was just singing along to Sanctus Real. But somehow, that singing sums up... my heart? Things I need - I want - things that are terrifying because they are so good - come from my mouth in requests that I never intended. It's awesome. It's beautiful. It scares me, because I might actually get them.
I'm not going to stop singing along.
Not enough people take those kind of requests seriously. I often pray to be humbled, than something happens that does just that and Im like "Where did that come from?" :)
Thanks, Anna Dear! <3
And this is why I find myself going into deep worship and prayer when I sing along with a lot of songs. I've gotten that with "Worlds Apart" before, and then there is MercyMe's "Word of God Speak". People really don't understand the power behind a lot of songs, but when you realize what is being said, and what you area singing...yah, "watch out" is a good warning, but so is "take it to heart". Part of why good Christain and worship musica are a big part of my life? I'd say so. ;-)
and this is why we need not be surprised when He answers these pleas.
*huggles*
I miss ya!
I've found myself signing thoughtlessly....unfortunately unlike you. I stop signing...I shut up,(At least till I can be SURE I really mean it, or think I do.) I have a lot of trouble on Sundays sometimes singing the songs sometimes. If I mumble along, I don't think about them really I'm just singing along with everyone cause I'm supposed too. When I stop and I think about it, sometimes I can't continue singing....Other times though I go back into it with twice the feeling and gusto.
I had a similar realization with Addison Road's "What Do I Know of Holy" - especially the lyric "Then I caught a glimpse of who You might be. The slightest hint of You brought me down to my knees." And later, "What do I know of wounds which will heal my shame?And a God who gave life its name?"
Absolutely humbling.